Day before Valentine's Day

Well my title pretty much says it all. Today is the day before Valentine's Day. Pretty excited about tomorrow. Going to spend the day with Gil of course. We are going to go see The Vow, which I have been dying to see for months now. (Just finished the book today and the movie will hopefully be just as amazing!!!) And get some dinner. And on Thursday, the 16th, will be exactly one month for us. It doesn't seem like it's been that long but the time has just flown by. Still job looking and getting absolutely nowhere. Really sick of this. A job is not too much to ask in my opinion. The interview I had with Gil's aunt went well but there were a few people ahead of me and they hired someone else instead of me. I'm tired of being below everyone else in this house. My aunt and uncle work and my cousin goes to school. And Gil is in college right now and Im not even doing that. I'm always at the bottom while everyone else is above me. And that's pretty much the worst feeling ever. And trying to stay positive about this whole thing is not easy. Still hoping something will change though. Hoping tomorrow will help take my mind off things. Been thinking of my family alot more too. My brother's birthday is this Friday. And I will not be able to see him.  And my mother's birthday is next month. I hate it when these kinda things come up and I can not be there because I know that I am no longer welcome in my own family. Guess that's about it. Will blog again soon.....